Saturday, October 23, 2010

People Protest Blue Ridge Parkway Funding

(K. Letterman News Service)

“I think it should be shut down,” said Davis Chenin, a dress boutique owner from Kansas. “It obviously has a liberal agenda.”

This was a sample of remarks spoken yesterday when it was revealed that the Blue Ridge Parkway was made available to people of every color and creed every day of the year. According to a document made public yesterday, a parkway official said “…any person is welcome on the Parkway, especially when the leaves start turning.”

“Leaves turning? Are you kidding me?” said Denise Mendelsohn of New Jersey. “Obviously this is a ploy to show that beauty is a thing to be experienced by everyone…including Muslims! And we’re funding this?”

State officials disclosed that many people of color were found cruising up and down the parkway “having a good time. This is normal activity at any time of the year, but especially when the leaves are turning.”

Marsha Sawkins, president of the Coalition to Limit Use of Sweet Trees for Everyday Rogues, said the law is obviously biased toward people she “…disagrees with.”

“How can our tax dollars fund such an obvious ploy to use beauty to bring people together?” Sawkins asked. “If we keep this funded by our money, gays and Muslims and motorcyclists will be taking advantage of money that we work so hard for. They have no right!”

The Blue Ridge Parkway, a parkway that runs through North Carolina and Virginia, has been open for decades, but according to CLUSTER officials, only recently have they been able to read the fine print that says the parkway is open for everyone to enjoy.

“I can’t imagine my tax dollars paying for such a fine example of beauty and sharing it with any Tom, Dick or Harry who happens to stop by,” said Sawkins. “And some of them even have cars.”

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