Albatrotsky

We all know that birds are social animals.

Opportunity

Blue Danube

(to Linda Ronstadt's "Blue Bayou") 

I danced so bad, I’m not a rhythmic guy

All the women passed me by

Arthur Murray never replied

Pre Blue Danube

Tuner  flipping after nine

Saw a film on channel five

Kubrick movie, a fortunate find

Heard Blue Danube

This music lit my flame

Danced untamed

To Blue Danube

Where I waltzed divine

Knew the floor was mine

Through Blue Danube

All the perfect notes

Sent my heels afloat

Desire, Herr Strauss gave me

So delighted was I

My feet did fly

Was hoofin’ with ease

Never dreamed my dance would transcend

Hope, I thought, had come to an end

Now the babes say “Dance with me friend

To Blue Danube.”

Don’t do cha cha, don’t do tap

No flamenco, chafes my aft

Disco, hustle, or seventies’ crap

Just Blue Danube.

I love to waltz all day     

Strings replay

Stan’s Blue Danube

Where the ships’ll fly

To the music’s time

Of Blue Danube

It’s not idle boast

That from coast to coast

My waltz is best you’ll see

That melodious guide

Yields sweetest tide

Make happy my feet

When was younger guy

I’d deride

Those classic tunes

Seemed a waste of time

When waltz now plays

Legs’ll shake malaise

And stars will align

Now I’m happy I viewed

That night on tube

My Blue Danube

No Notes

Equality- Apparently, It's Just a Silly Suggestion

It's the Least Sensible Time of the Year

(to "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year")

It’s the least sensible time of the year
With the candidates selling
A package that’s smelling
You’ve reason to fear
It’s the least ethical time of the year

It’s the tack- tackiest season of all
All those principles missing
When buttocks get kissing
See donors enthralled
It’s the tack- tackiest season of all

All the lib’rals are Trotskys
Conservatives’ Nazis
A ver’tible lit’ny of woe
Hear their scary, fear stories
In hopes you'll have worries
And not vote for sensible foe

It’s the most farcical time of the year
There’ll be poor news reporting
And common sense thwarting
With microphones near
It’s the most farcical time of the year

There’ll be his’try rewriting
Shrill bellows and biting
They never will cease to amaze
All the candidates loosing
Those spots so abusing
Are evidence of lost mores.

It’s the most magical time of the year
There’ll be much misdirection
And ego projection
You’ll hem’rage severe

It’s the least sensible time
Yes the most farcical time
It’s the most magical time of the year.