1- And it came to pass that man created distractions in his own image.
2- They said to one another, "Let us create a salve that will keep us from doing things that we ought do and keep us from thinking things we ought ponder."
3- The elders sat and looked wise for they were old and could do little more than look old and wise.
4- Suddenly, an elder by the name of Realiteevus cried in a loud voice: "We must find the biggest idiots in the village and make them into examples so that we can be amused by their abherrant behaviour. And we can sit and watch them on the magically lit box for hours and righteously think well of ourselves."
5- And the people were delighted for they were exhausted with doing things that they ought and thinking things that they should.
6- Soon the village gathered the idiots into one place and asked the idiots to be themselves. And they complied.
7- Scribes documented the moment, joyfully recording the least redeeming sides of the village idiots.
8- And the documents were shared on the magically lit box, and many in the village watched and grinned and rejoiced in their manufactured distraction.
9- Then it came to pass that little to nothing ever got done and everyone felt good about themselves.