Sunday, November 21, 2010

Elmer Fudd (A Wabbit Tale)


(to Bruce Springsteen's Born to Run)

In a knoll he creeps
About hunting meat
For a pun-a-day nefarious beast
In sight he spies
His unflappable quarry
With homicidal gleam
Meal he gauges
Trusty Browning primed
Hare squeals, “I’m protected
Don’t shoot me,
I’m one of a kind.”
Dooooh!
Hunter then frowns
Hears a moan near his back
It’s a bear black
Then an open paw smack
Our hero flies and then he thuds
He seems nonplussed
“Wabbit I be Elmer Fudd.”

As he hunts again
He sighs and slyly grins
“I’m gonna twick
That wabbit villain
A twap with keg
Full of powder gwim
Fwom Acme fwiends’ demwolitions.”
The weather brings
Boom thunder clap
He sadly looks up
Lightning from sky lights a match.
Booooom!
Elmer looks like
Briquette from a fire
Walks crazy,
He’s an impaired and crispy fighter
Now he’s burnin’
With ragin’ zeal
His wabbit foe has made him wild
Wagin’ war to win his wabbit meal

(bridge)
His sleep is manic
Bugs, his dulcet tones
Rings through the walls of heart
Explosions reel,
His manhood rattled
New found choice
Seems to light a spark
Feels a fusion
With bunny good at heart
Not befuddled,
Wants a friend with a twist
He wants to run with the bunny
When the moment’s right
Be his ever after Miss

(Dear hare, I’m yours)

The hunter man and Bugs
Are off to Reno
After vows
‘Neath harbor lights
Loony bunny’s
Out with the Fudd tonight
And two hearts beat side by side
“I wuv you Bugsy
Make me well up wiff gwadness,”
Said Elmer,
“You are my wabbit in my soul.”
Oooh
“I’m your hare.
I’m your best friend,”
Bugs Bunny wants to embrace
On their Warner Brother’s show
And they’ll walk now as one
Fulfills their species crush
Mister Missus Elmer Fudd

Copyright 2010 Warren Baker

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